How did you go with Valentine’s Day?
Chocolates, flowers and champagne?
A night out at a trendy, horrifically expensive restaurant run by shouty chefs?
Perhaps your lover whisked you off via helicopter to a private beach, where he (or she), dramatically proposed as fireworks lit up the sky.
If so, and I won’t mince words here, you are
Yes, if you’re single, Valentine’s Day can suck. Big Time.
No one likes to be the odd one out as gift hampers and balloons get delivered to every girl (or guy) in the office. No one wants to be ignored or feel unloved on the one day of the year when we’re supposed to feel wanted and admired.
But hey, it could be worse. You could have been dumped on Valentine’s Day, which apparently happens to almost 50 per cent of people in the teen/young adult age group.
Experts say, there is something about V.D. that makes people re-evaluate their relationships. The same with Valentine's Day. (Boom tish!)
Is that chick you've been seeing worth splashing out on imported roses from a florist, or should she be happy with a cheap bunch of wilted service station blooms? That kind of thing.
Think it can’t happen to you?
Don’t be so sure.
My first Valentine’s Day break-up was during my first year of college, where I was studying for my Bachelor of Arts.
The boy, I’ll call him W., was pretty special. He was the first one I ever ... Exchanged Christmas gifts with. (What? What did you think I was going to say?)
But on Valentine’s Day, he turned up with a bunch of his mates, pissed out of his head, and bearing a bunch of flowers. Stolen flowers. From some innocent person’s lovingly cared-for garden.
After a few rather enthusiastic expressions of love, he asked me to join him at Valentine's Day concert that was on nearby. I was studying for a politics exam which I had to take the next day, and being a bit of a swot, I was not impressed.
I told him so. He told me I needed to lighten up.
I can’t remember what happened after that, but I think it involved about two hours in my room where we argued, cried, and yelled at each other. All while his mates, locked out of the room, banged on my windows and door asking us to hurry up!
The result was his flowers ended up in the bin, he left with his mates, and our 'relationship' was over.
It broke my heart for, oh, all of about five minutes. Okay, a couple of weeks. The worst part was when unsuspecting friends asked me what I’d received for Valentine’s Day – and I had the ‘fess up the horrible truth. I Was Not Worthy.
Since then, I’ve both endured and enjoyed countless Valentine’s Days. Some have been spent alone, and some of them have ended in tears.
On one memorable occasion a partner had lunch with me, and dinner with his mistress. (As I found out later).
Occasionally, I’ve been well spoiled, with expensive gift hampers, lingerie, jewellery, dinners out, and the rest.
I’ve even had happy Valentine's Days as a single; enjoying rowdy, fun-filled meals and gossip with single girlfriends.
But the dreamy Valentine’s Days have been in the minority.
Even in the years I was happily married, we generally didn’t celebrate Valentine’s Day, due to the cost and the hype. And besides, every day was Valentine’s Day, right?
This year, I got Sweet Fanny All for Valentine’s Day.
Oh wait, that’s wrong. My kids came home to me on the night before with a couple of decent headfulls of nits.
I spent the night helping them fine tooth-comb out their hair till their scalps bled, but the next morning, Miss 7’s hair was still full of the nasty little feckers and their eggs.
Mr 10’s hair was fine, so we dropped him off at school, but not before he rubbed his head against Miss 7’s in a vain attempt to get a day off school.
Turned out not to be in vain after all.
Because I got a call about half an hour later to say C. was itching and complaining, and they thought he better come home too.
So Valentine’s Day afternoon was spent de-lousing my family, and washing all our clothes and bed-clothes.
I might have felt lonely except for my followers and friends on twitter, many of whom were spending Valentine’s Day alone, or in sensible ‘we’re-not-buying-into-the-hype’ and ‘who-can-afford-it-anyway?’ relationships.
Some had tummy bugs, others were laid low with sick kids. Some were saving money, and a couple of people found themselves, sadly, saying their goodbyes. (Or yelling. As the case might be).
Luckily for all of us, the wonderful team at Lindt Australia have come up with the ultimate in comfort food for someone who missed out on love (and chocolates) on Valentine’s Day. The hamper is valued at $100 in gorgeous Lindt treats, and is perfect to enjoy in bed. All by yourself. Non-sharing of chocolates is one of the benefits of being snubbed on V. Day. It's the law.
To win, simply check that you’re following my blog, then leave a comment as to why you deserve the hamper of Swiss chocolatey goodness!
Winners drawn on Friday, February 18.
And if you are one of the lucky ones to have been loved up on Valentine's Day, Lindt Australia has some fantastic suggestions on how to make special days romantic here.